1、爱情只有两种，一种是飞蛾扑火，一种是我从没见过。。。2、几乎所有的连环杀手都是男人，这是因为女人更喜欢用很多年的时间缓慢地折磨死一个男人。3、衣服这种东西对于女生来说，没拍照就等于没穿过，但拍过一次照就等于快没衣服穿了。4、矫情时有多爽，清醒后就有多尴尬。5、我们每个人都是至尊宝，都有一个紫霞在心中，我们想用至尊宝去呵护紫霞，却发现如果自己不是孙悟空却连让她基本的生存都成问题，我们不想披上一层猴皮，却发现没有那层猴皮，连最基本的爱的权利都没有。6、问：如果上帝是女人会怎样？
答：那我不仅要下地狱，还永远也不会知道是为什么。7、跟一相亲女聊天，她说房子要买在她单位附近，要不低于90平，要能接受她父母定期过来居住。
然后问我怎么看，我说如果另一半可以给到这些，你能为对方付出什么？
她说感情是不能斤斤计较的。
---------乐侃男女笑“话”多
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